vii. Greener Grass

The other day I had a small epiphany – that I am a chronic sufferer of Greener Grass Syndrome.

‘GGS’ is one of those sneaky conditions, so subtle in its symptoms that you don’t even know you have it until something knocks you off course. That something happened to me a couple of weeks ago; we had guests staying, and I found myself getting increasingly frustrated with HF. Being quieter in character than me, I started to get annoyed at his shyness around them; why was he being so reserved? Couldn’t he make an effort and show more interest in them? Didn’t he know I wanted to be part of a fun, chatty, popular couple?! Before I knew it, this little thought had crept into my mind: “I should’ve married someone more outgoing”.

The instant I thought it, I’d let GGS creep in. Forget about all the special things HF and I have in common, all the ways I’m daily blessed by him, and all the beautiful things in The Love List – that very second, Greener Grass Syndrome displaced my joy with the desire for more.

How easy it is to fall into this trap! The snare of GGS had once again lured me into thinking that something else, someone else, a different path, would be better than God’s choices for me.

It’s not just relationships and marriages that fall victim to this crafty syndrome. Jobs, friendships, things we see of the lives of others; in all of these areas and beyond, we can find ourselves feeling dissatisfied with the current blessings in our lives.

All the while, the Bible tells us that God already has us on his pre-plotted path; he has individually tailored everything in our lives to our unique needs and personalities: “For from him and through him and to him are all things” (Romans 11, verse 36). All we have is from above, and he has already given us everything we need.

There is, therefore, no ‘better’ waiting for us on the other side of the fence.

A few days after our guests left, I went round to a friend’s to tell her about my latest GGS encounter. As her husband is particularly extroverted, I told her about how I’d wished HF could have more of his outgoing nature. She smiled, and then told me about how she often wished her husband was better at DIY and more interested in fixing things around the house; “like yours does”, she added.

We laughed together. Perhaps that other grass isn’t much greener after all. And thank the Lord for our different, individual, hand-picked plots.

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